Let It Go

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight, not a footprint to be seen. A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I’m the queen.

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside. Couldn’t keep it in, Heaven knows I tried. Don’t let them in, don’t let them see. Be the good girl you always have to be. Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know. Well, now they know!

Let it go, let it go! Can’t hold it back any more. Let it go, let it go! Turn away and slam the door. I don’t care what they’re going to say. Let the storm rage on. The cold never bothered me anyway.

It’s funny how some distance, makes everything seem small. And the fears that once controlled me, can’t get to me at all It’s time to see what I can do, to test the limits and break through. No right, no wrong, no rules for me. I’m free!

Let it go, let it go. I am one with the wind and sky. Let it go, let it go. You’ll never see me cry. Here I’ll stand, and here I’ll stay. Let the storm rage on.

My power flurries through the air into the ground. My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast I’m never going back; the past is in the past!

Let it go, let it go. And I’ll rise like the break of dawn. Let it go, let it go That perfect girl is gone Here I stand, in the light of day.

Let the storm rage on! The cold never bothered me anyway…

-Disney’s Frozen Let It Go Lyrics 

This week I had a serious case of writers block. I had plenty of topics I wanted to write about but I was not able to write about any of them! The words would not come out. Everything sounded scripted and I hit the backspace more than I typed so I gave up on those and decided to lay down and think about where my mind was really wandering. The answer was pretty clear and anyone who follows my twitter feed could have probably told me! My mind was stuck on the children’s songs repeating in my head from the past weekend with my nephews…

My sister, her husband and my two little nephews came to visit me in Chicago over Memorial Day. It was special for so many reasons. My sister had not been to visit since before her oldest, A, was born and he is going to be four in October. I hadn’t seen A or L since Christmas. A is 3 and L is 1, so they change quite a lot in 5 months when they are that young! When I last saw L he ran and cried from me. It broke my heart, because I am so close to A, but during this trip he was all smiles, kisses and love. This was A’s first trip to see his Auntie Shell Shell in ‘Cago, so that was quite special as well. We did so many fun things with the kids and made so many memories. By the end of the weekend I literally felt like my heart was going to burst when I gave my final squeezes to A and L.

Me and the lil munchkins

Me and the lil munchkins

At some point during the weekend A was telling me about all of his favorite movies. He is a talker. Talk talk talk talk talk. He told me that I looked like Elsa from the movie Frozen. I had never seen the movie so I figured he was telling me I was some evil step monster because he’s funny like that. So, I said, “is Elsa evil or is she good?” He thought for a second and said, “hmmm…she’s goood…but she can just shoot ice like this. Pow. Pow.” So, then, I asked, “Oh, is Elsa pretty?” “OH, Yeah!” he said, as he shook his head. Awwww! I gave him a big kiss. He told me I look like someone he thinks is pretty from a Disney movie. What a little cutie pie! I mean, I kind of prompted him, but that’s besides the point…LOL!

Me and A

Me and A

So, now, I wanted to see this movie! I had already watched enough Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles so that night we popped in Frozen (of course they brought his current favorite dvd along).

Watching this sweet little boy sit on the couch so innocently and sing along to all the songs was the sweetest thing I had ever seen. When the popular song “Let it Go” came on and I was listening to the lyrics while simultaneously listening to his little voice, I nearly burst into tears. I seriously was choking them back. I couldn’t let him see me cry during his favorite movie. He would have no idea why his auntie was crying….

The lyrics and what was happening with the character was so intense and I felt it deep inside. I’ve always felt like I’ve had to be that “good girl” as Elsa says but she finally feels free and is able to be herself and “let it go” once her powers are exposed. I’m not exactly sure what “powers” I’m looking to expose, but I do know that I just want to be me and just want to let it go and that’s why I related to the lyrics so much.

I went searching for a necklace with these lyrics because I loved it so much. I finally found one that I really love on a website called Hip To Be Me, but unfortunately it is currently out of stock. I’ll keep checking back on their website and searching other places as well (as it’s a little pricier than I would usually spend- but I figured the meaning behind it was worth it).

letitgosmall

I know it’s sort of backwards to write about something when I do not even own it yet, but what can I say, that’s me! It’s dominated my thoughts so it only made sense to tell you.

Until next week….Xx!

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